I was talking to someone about infertility. It wasn't anything that she said, but later I realized that she thought that because I had children I was "cured" of infertility.
I know, I know, I got a family, but the spankingly hard journey of getting there has left it's marks. I am one of the lucky ones, my marriage was strengthened and not destroyed and I got two great kids. But the scars are there. I guess that is why I still read so many blogs about IF. You have been there and you feel validated to know that you are not alone. I was reading someone who talked about crying in the car. Lord knows that and the shower were two of my favourite places.
I love my children, but I sometimes feel like a fraud. What will they say when they find out that they are not genetically related to me? Will they care? My husband thinks that they won't. Sometimes I doubt myself. Am I good enough? After all, it did not come naturally. I know that being nuts about this will not help anyone. It will not make me a better mother. I don't think about it all the time, but sometimes it trickles in. There are days when the black dog of depression can rear it's head.
You wonder will Infertility will ever be over? When will I reach a place of peace on this? I would really like to live there.